Tiny Dancer

We sway in our own little dance in the dark. Me holding her close, trying to ward off the cramps that her body seems to be racked with, Her, curling into my shoulder whimpering, occasionally when it gets really bad, screaming from the pain. I do my best to soothe her; we rock in the dark, I murmur quietly in her ear, she starts to doze. She is so tiny. So perfect. Just as I think I can put her down again her back arches and she screams in pain. Again. We start our dance over.

Wash, rinse, repeat…

And so goes the wee hours of my mornings.

I hate to listen to my baby hurting. The lack of sleep wouldn’t bother me nearly as much if my staying up would somehow bring her some relief. But instead she’s in pain & I’m exhausted. I guess it could be worse, she could be waking up the rest of the house. I have a call into her GI specialist about what I should expect from the medicine and when. I stopped eating soy (luna bars) on Tuesday, on Sunday I drop dairy. Then I’ll be really fun to be around. Thing is, she’s happy most of the time. Very sweet, fun, happy and then come middle of the night all hell breaks loose on her insides.

I just wish I could fix this for her.