The One I Miss the Most is...

Turns out in Kansas you have to get a couple of hamsters to run on a wheel to get the interwebs going....kidding. But my internet access while visiting in Kansas last week was pretty limited, as was my posting. I have much good blog fodder, as you might imagine, after spending a week w/60+ cousins, aunts, uncles, grandparents, etc...It was a very crazy, but fun time. The girls has a blast & we had the first good weather we've ever had when visiting Kansas. Still, I'm really, really glad to be home.

Happy to be back in my own bed has taken on a new meaning for me. We slept in my husband's childhood room, which seems to have been frozen in time. What's up with that? My brother took over my room 2 minutes after I went to college (and I was coming back). And my mom couldn't get our crap out of the house fast enough, so she could paint & redecorate. My MIL (Mother In Law) on the other hand, seems to think DaddySpeak might suddenly decide to move back in & would want his room just as he left it TWENTY-something YEARS ago. Maybe DaddySpeak was a more likeable teenager than I, hmmm.....
I digress, (how surprising,) my husband's bed is part of this 20+ year set, and the mattress is HARD. Since we know I'm such a delicate flower, I didn't handle this sleeping arrangement so well. By day 2 I was taking muscle relaxers so I could actually move. During the night, I'd wake myself up every time I tried to move from the pain. My Fibro was rearing it's ugly head, it wasn't good. I bought my Outlaws a new pillow on day 2. I gave it to them after I used it for the week. ;-) That helped keep my neck in check for the rest of the time. My neck still hurt, but it wasn't unbearable anymore. My lower back was pretty unbearable by day 4.

I used to feel bad about the bed my Outlaws sleep in when they come to visit, but I don't anymore.

Amazing Women

This post started out as a recap/review of the SVMoms Holiday party. "Started Out" would be the key words there. I loved all the great companies that were there. It was awesome to get to talk to their representatives & see the products in person. But first I wanted to mention all the incredible WOMEN I got to meet! And the post just mentioning who they were got SO. INCREDIBLY. LONG. The result is that my recap of the companies is going to have to wait a little longer. Tonight is just about the WOMEN!

It was very exciting for me to meet so many of these women IRL. And if you know me, you know I like to talk a bit. So the number of people listed here, shouldn't really surprise you. (And I KNOW I left someone off. I'm sorry! I tried to remember everyone I talked to, but I just know there are people I left off.) While these are the participants I got to hang w/there were many, many more. SERIOUSLY. I feel so blessed to live in a place where so many women are so powerful, talented and excited to share those things. I'm even luckier that these women have included me in their fold. They are my idols, mentors and friends. If you have an opportunity you should take a moment to check them out. You will not be disappointed.

To start I drove up (in the Chevy Equinox, loaned to me by Chevy for the week). My cohorts in crime were;
MommyTwinGirls--Aka Linda, Blog: It's Never Easy, But It's Always Fun
Sharon, Blogs: "Whatever Things Are True", & "Be Bold or Go Home"
And
Amy (who is a twins mom, and has yet to commit to posting on SVMoms yet, but we'll bring her to the dark side yet)

The ride up was fun. We got to talk about who knows, who and how. How we got into blogging, our kids (duh) and how excited we were to have a night out about us!!!
At the party I finally got to meet:

SV Mom (herself, I KNOW, I feel like I met a rockstar! Squeeee!) Jill Asher
Alix, med nauseum blog
Ana Garza, The Garza Girls
Ana or Bongamom, Finding Bonggamom & Bonggamom Finds
Beth, Techmamas
Darryle, Cluttercast
Jane, This Week for Dinner
Myrna, TangerineTimes.com
Nicole, Not Just a Working Mom & Not Just a Working Mom Reviews
Sheila, Xiaolinmama

And, of course, SV Moms, I already knew:
Akemi, Chalk and Cheese Chronicles
Linsey, Me Too You & Whereas

I'm not done either! If you're still with me? There were mom's who are not contributors to SVMoms, but are very active in that community. If you know me at all, you know I'm VERY active on Twitter. I've become "good friends" w/several people on Twitter & a few were there also. So fun to meet them In Real Life too!!!

@GraceD, Grace, State of Grace
@vdog, Vdog & Little Man
@Glennia, The Silent "I"
@kikarose, Jessica, It's My Life
@citymama, Stefania, CityMama
@babyjidesign, Carla, babyjidesign

Still here? Good. If you take the opportunity to read some of the things these women write you will not be disappointed, I promise. My "real life" friends have trouble understanding my "virtual life". If you take the opportunity to read these women, I know you'll understand. So many people and so much talent, and I got to meet them all In Real Life! I'm all hot to go to BlogHer now.

Personaly Stimulating the Economy & Healthcare System

So you know how busy I was those last couple weeks? Yeah, well writing about it didn't jinx it or anything. It has still be crazy busy.

Yesterday, I got a call from school to come pick up Big. She had a stomach ache. She's been on meds for reflux since April & they don't seem to be cutting it anymore. They seemed to help initially, but now it seems like they aren't lasting as long & the frequency of her stomach aches are more often. I made an appointment to have her seen today, so they could refer her to a GI doctor for more testing. Did you know, the way they determine if your kid has reflux is to give them the meds. If the meds help, then volia, it's reflux, if not, then they test them for other things. No, really that's how they decide if your kid has reflux. Before we move to do anything else, I want her tested for to be sure it is reflux. So I will be dealing with this during the holidays. They also changed her meds, just to see if this other brand might help more. Doubtful.

Big also complained of a tooth hurting her yesterday. She said it felt like food was stuck in-between her teeth. When I went to take a look, ACK! She had an abscess! DaddySpeak thought it might be a really bad canker sore, but I wasn't messing around with it. Trust me, it was NASTY! Funny, I can watch you bleed out or someone take your heart out & it won't phase me. But if it involves the mouth, I get grossed out so easily. I actually considered (and so did the dentist) that the new tooth might be coming in, but because it was so crowded, it was being pushed out. Strait out. Like toward the front of her mouth. Ewww! It gives me the heebie jeebies just to think about it. Anyway, we had a 7 PM dentist appointment to confirm it's an abscess and the tooth needs to come out. Her baby canine is being crowded out by the tooth right in front of it, which is an adult tooth. The new tooth's root is crowding out the baby tooth's root, which is not ready to dissolve just yet. So the new tooth ended up killing the nerve in the baby tooth and causing the abscess. We're going to a pediatric dentist so she can have nitrous. They can't get us in till tomorrow. I am also getting my permanent crown on tomorrow. So it'll just be a dentist sort of day for us Speaks. It's a party!

Not to be left out, Little has had a runny nose this week. Nothing big, but she has to blow a couple times a day or so. On the way to the doctor for Big she complained of her ear bothering her. She's been grumpy because of this cold/runny nose I told her I'd get the doctor to look at it, to get her to chill. Worked too. Doctor looked at it and she seems to have the start of a an ear infection. Great!

Tonight after dinner & bath, I drove over to the pharmacy to get reflux meds for Big & antibiotics for Little. Somewhere in between all of this I'm going to pack to go on vacation. And at some point in time I'm actually going to sleep too. I swear it's going to happen.

The Post that Became a Drinking Game

"The Proverbial Chicken" was supposed to be the title of this post. But as you can see it evolved a bit. Read on:

That would be me. The proverbial chicken, running around w/my head cut off. I know you've gotten the gist of my moaning and groaning this week. But along w/the general aches, pains, coughs, stomach- & head-aches, life has not stopped to accommodate me. Quite the contrary, it's just starting to get moving. I feel a lot like I'm barely keeping my head above water these days. Stick w/me here, I'm pretty sure I'll manage to get in several more cliches before this is done. Perhaps we could make it a drinking game, that should keep you reading. (Take two swigs!)

We are at the end of soccer season, which means this weekend is the big tournament. All soccer, all the weekend. At least 4 games, perhaps 5, I think. And, in case you've been living under a rock, (drink!) the holidays are upon us. I'm still feeling a bit floored by this, as if they've managed to sneak up on me somehow. At the end of next week we fly to Kansas for a week. (Insert obligatory "We're not in Kansas anymore" joke here. I think that one deserves a shot, it's cliche-ish, so drink!) This means I need to get to packing a weeks worth of winter clothes for all of us this week. If you're a mom, you are thinking, "that means getting all the laundry done,"aren't you? And you'd be right. Just to keep us on our toes, (drink!) the school has scheduled parent/teacher conferences this week. Parent/Teacher conferences means half days at school. All Week. I'm sure this will help greatly w/my time management. Wonder how Big feels about laundry & packing? Guess we'll find out. Don't forget the end of year soccer banquet is this weekend! I will be missing it, as I'm starting off to the Holiday Party Season by attending the SVMoms Group Holiday Party. (You will be very jealous when you see all the cool sponsors. I'm one of the mom's driving a Chevy to the party and all this week. If you follow my Tweets I'm sure you're well aware of this. I'm driving the Equinox & will be providing my review soon.)
When we get back from Kansas, it will be the first week of December, which includes my Dad & I's birthdays. (I don't want to talk about it, I'm about to be in my 40s. Not just 40, but in my 40s, and this is bothering me greatly.) Being December, everything will suddenly rocket into full speed; (drink!) there will be Christmas programs at church & both girls' schools. My family has scheduled to take the girls to see the Nutcracker one afternoon (I think we're going to go to tea too!) We have a day of baking in the schedule, a night of Caroling, several neighborhood parties and just for fun, Big will be bridging in Girl Scouts ("bridging up from a Daisy Scout to a Brownie). Somewhere in there we will get a tree. If the weather agrees, we'll make a day of it & go to the mountains to cut it down. If not, we'll have the annual Christmas trek to Home Depot. We Speak's, we're all about traditions.

I'm kinda tired just writing it all down. Seriously.

Right now, I'm still trying to catch up from my outlaws visit. You could say I'm getting wiser in my old age. Instead of stressing while they're here, I just live w/the piles while they're here and tackle them once they leave. I've learned it doesn't do me much good to try and pick up too much while they're visiting. Once I clear a space someone will start a new pile there (I wish I were joking). I figure I'm cleaning up the same amount of stuff, just all at once. But like I said, I'm still trying to wrap my head around it. (drink!) And because we work well under pressure, (drink!) we must, why else would be keep doing this to ourselves? We decided to refinance our mortgage right now. Pick up your chin off the floor, it's unbecoming. We talked about this earlier in the year, but just now have the rates gotten to the point where it's worth our while to do it. It will be worth it in the long run. (drink!) If I keep saying that, at some point I'll believe it, right? No, really, it will be worth it. We're going to pull money out to redo ALL the windows, get a new front door & add French doors in our dinning room. It will soooo be worth it. AND we're going to have a lower monthly payment. So yeah, very worth it. Though I do admit, giving up those ill-fitting, rattling windows does mean giving up some blog fodder, but I've decided I'm willing to make that sacrifice. I'm sure I'll manage to schedule the window install right in the middle of all the crazy holiday activities. That should make up for any posts I'll lose to the rattling windows, dontcha think? Today, I spent my day stressing because I COULD NOT locate 2007's tax return. The mess of the house was a lot of my stress. (This is the mess that is still here from the outlaws.) The return was missing from the file, and everything else was there, so it was misfiled. That meant it wasn't going to be anywhere logical. I also could not find it on our computer (remember my laptop crashed on me two weeks ago?) We back up our files in triplicate, (that means on 3 separate back up drives, not carbon copies) so I couldn't understand how it could be that I couldn't find it. Having Little home all day, I couldn't take the time till tonight to really delve into trying to locate it. So I was freaking out inside my head all day. Woot! I was lots of fun to be around, trust me. I did finally find it. I also found several other missing things, so I guess it wasn't a total loss. I guess.
Ok, insert appropriate pun laden cliche here, drink! and I'm headed to bed. I do have an early soccer game to get to after all. Drink!

Melancholy Me

Lately, I'm feeling all melancholy.

I think it's the weather, or my Fibromyalgia (Fibro) symptoms. Probably a little of both. Depression is a symptom of Fibro & I often feel I'm "one straw" away from breaking that camel's back. I guess for me melancholy is one step away from depression. It's so easy to get into a rut & feel sorry for yourself. Especially when your day-to-days seem to run into each other. I've been very reactive lately w/the girls being sick, my laptop dying, feeling like crap, etc...it's not good. That final straw seems to weigh more and more. I need to get more proactive, to take some of the weight off, but if you've been where I am, you know that's easier said than done. Don't worry, I'm not about to go off the deep end. I'm not walking around sulking & pouting, but it's in the back of my head. It's almost like I can see the blackness sitting on the horizon, waiting.

I'm still working on getting a handle on this Stay At Home Mom (SAHM) gig. (It's only been 18 months, after all. Looking like I'm not going to get a handle, huh?) I've gotten much better at learning my boundaries; read: "How to say no". I believe that my herniated disc was my teacher on that one. It's a hard lesson for me. Ms. Type A, unable to volunteer for everything under the sun. I hate being a flake more than I hate not being in charge, so I have taken big steps back on those fronts. Now, I don't volunteer for things until it's closer to the event. It's unusual for volunteers to get turned down, and since I'm not always sure how well I'll be it's been a good ploy for me. But it's hard on my ego. Now I'm working on my discipline. The lack of hard deadlines is still a tough one for me to wrap my head around. There is no "done" for a SAHM. I knew that going into it, but living it can still a hard adjustment. I know, if I get routines in place, and actually FOLLOW THEM, then I'm golden. It's that whole follow thru thing that seems to elude me. There's always laundry, dishes, picking up...it get old. But I also know if I get off my high horse & do it, I'm happier. I guess I wanted to remind myself of that. I also felt a little like, if I get this out of my head maybe it'll stay out.

Thanks for hanging, pity party is over.

When It Rains It Pours

Hello!
Yes, I'm still here. Been having a Fibro episode. Trying to deny it was happening, but there's really no denying it now. Too many symptoms, too many reactions in all the right (or wrong) ways.
I had started feeling like my pain was coming back in my back. It's the side from my surgery so I was making excuses to myself. You know typical stuff; I slept wrong, I picked up Little when I shouldn't have, etc... But in my head I knew what I was doing, so I started going low carb to see if it would help things. I wasn't super good, so I didn't think it was helping. Then, Saturday we celebrated my niece's birthday. I was good till it was time for cake. The thing about when you have chronic pain is that you crave things that will make you feel better.
Chocolate makes me feel better. Well, sort of.
Chocolate causes an endorphin rush. The endorphin rush gives you an sense of pain relief. You can see the conundrum this creates, can't you? So I have no self control when it comes to chocolate. I had no chance against the cake. (It was one of those big Costco chocolate ones, w/the chocolate pieces layered on the sides,) I ate a whole piece. And the next day, I was a mess. The back pain, pain in my ankles (that's a new spot for me) and the headache. The headache's from tension in my neck & shoulders. Usually those are the first spots to really bother me, but I didn't know how messed up they were till I went & got a massage & had to tell her to back off. I'm usually a dig your elbow in & put your full body weight into it kinda girl. But my neck & shoulder area was so tight I couldn't let her do too much. Not a good sign. The result of all that tension in my neck & shoulders is that I clench my jaw. Jaw clenching (teeth grinding) in turn give me bad headaches. All of this effects my ability to sleep well. And the cycle continues.
Oh yeah, with all that the girls got swine flu, my outlaws were visiting, Halloween occurred, my laptop died, etc.... My point is that it's been busy around here.

Wordless Wednesday - Halloween Edition

I think this pretty much sums up our Halloween week, dontcha think? (This was my costume before it was caught, so my theory is that karma has no sense of humor.) And, Internets, don't say I never give you anything, cuz this is such an awful pix of me, but I posted it anyway. Cuz, I'm a giver!

Happy Halloween!

OK, really it's Dia de los Muertos (Day of the Dead)! Halloween was Kra-Zeee!!! Fun, but Krazee! We went Trick-or-Treating w/our neighbors, which meant about 20 kids. (No exaggeration!) It took us about 2 hours to basically go around the block, and the kids scored with all their loot. (And Mama & Daddy did pretty well on Trick-or-Drink, I love Halloween!) Very Mayberry USA. We had georgous weather, wore sweatshirts & jeans, and had a nearly full moon. Perfect. Not much else to say, it was perfect. Perfectly uneventful & normal.