Inspiration (AKA: I Win At Coolest Mom EVER!)

I am not going to vent & bitch today.
Opps!
Should've told you to sit down, sorry. My bad.  Pick yourself off the floor now.

My daughters are both very into art.  You know how kids have a default activity they tend toward when there's nothing else going on?  It's art for my girls.  They have 2 large drawers in my kitchen desk full of art supplies.  They also have 2 full cabinets in my laundry room of art & craft kits. (Also, paint, fabric markers, playdough & everything else they have to have permission to use.)  So Christmas was coming & I was trying to think what to get them from us.  Santa brings them each a "big" gift (scooter for Big, doll car for Little.)  But we usually give them one "big gift" from us.  Last year it was the trampoline.  So, I'm trying to think of what they love & then what we could get them related to that. I immediately went to ART! Of course!  So, what can I get them, besides more crayons & paper?  It dawned on me.  I'm constantly on them to put their stuff away.  The problem is that they out grew the drawers where they keep their supplies, before we even put the stuff away.  I thought how cool would it be, for all of us, if we could give them an art studio!  That would be very cool, but how do you give them a "studio"?  It's not something you go buy at Target, right?

Read on:

Here's the deal; we have a large "living room" in the front of our house.  In the back we've created a "great room" which includes, the kitchen, a dining area & a "family room."  Next to the kitchen & partly behind the living room is a "formal dining room."  We use the dining room as a dining room about 2x a year, maybe.  The rest of the year, the table becomes a place to put things we don't want to put away.  Last year we replaced the window in there & made it into a sliding door.  Now this room has direct access to the part of the yard, where the trampoline sits.  So the kids are constantly going through that room anyway.  When we moved in, we made our living room into a "play room."   The idea being that we won't have their toys where we're hanging out.  But after 5 years, I'm tired of the mess in there and want to turn in back into more of a "family room."  (It would still be their 'playroom,' but a little more adult friendly; Newer furniture. Toys are more hidden.  I'll tell you more about that in another post.) So, if we were to give them the dining room as an art room, they have room to play, store their art stuff & I can clean up a bit more.  Plus we would be actually using the room, instead of just dumping crap in it.  So we sold the dinning room set.  It was my grandmother's.  It made me a little sad to see it go.  I really liked it.  It just didn't go w/the rest of our house and it wasn't getting used.  So I'm glad it's going to get the attention it deserves.

Here's what it looked like as a dinning room. (These are the pix I used for selling it, so there's no stuff on the hutch.

First, we painted: (DaddySpeak painted.  Elfie & I observed.)

See dark green wall being painted blue.

Added new furniture. (Yeah! Ikea!)

Old light fixture in this one.  

And lots of art supplies from the grandparents under the Christmas tree!

Christmas Morning. They like it!

I'm still working on getting the walls set up.  I'm going to get some quotes in vinyl to put on  the walls.  I have square cork boards I'm going to cover w/fabric to hang "masterpieces." But really, I want them to have influence on what we put up.  It should be stuff that inspires them.
Right?
(I know, I totally wish I was my mom too.) ;-)

Happy New...Meh

I know that being a new year & all, I'm supposed to be all reflective & stuff. Meh. I want to set resolutions this year, (which is really a first for me to be honest).  And there's a litany of obvious items I want to resolve to change, but really, I can't be bothered to think that hard about it.  Doesn't say much for how well I would keep said resolutions, does it? 
My real issue, is that I'm not sure exactly what my issue is.  (I'm a freaking one-man philosophy course.)  I want, no need to lose weight.  My current status is beyond embarrassing.  I've basically put on 10 lbs every year for the past four years.  No, that's not exactly how it happened.  Yeah, I (obviously) contributed to it.  (As I shove a doughnut in my pie hole.  No, not really, but hey, did someone say doughnuts???)  But it also happened/started in relation to something that happened TO me, (herniated disc/surgery).  For some reason, I can NOT get past that.  It seems that all my "issues" come down to that problem; "I didn't have fun getting this way.  It's not fair and therefore I shall ignore it and hope it goes away!"  When it doesn't go away, I shall have an adult-style temper-tantrum; and eat my feelings.  (They all taste like chocolate, how lucky for me.)  What might take most people years of therapy to get to, I've managed to boil down in a single paragraph.  Look, at the money I'm saving!  As usual, I can see, hear, touch, and taste the problem, but I don't know how to get to it emotionally.  Therefore, I'm not really sure how to fix it. 
Maybe it's that you don't really "fix" it.  Maybe, just maybe, the answer is that you "fake it till you make it."  You act like whatever it is you want (a size 6 waist,) and eventually you get there be default.  Obviously, if it's my weight, I need to start eating like a supermodel if size 6 really were the goal.  It's not. But you get the idea.
In that vein, (faking it,) here are the things I'd like to change in some manner this year:

Lose weight (diet & exercise)
Pursue something more serious w/my photography (actually get some info on how to do that.)
Be able to do more physically w/my kids (exercise)
Stop feeling like I'm stalled out (I feel like I'm waiting for something to happen, but I don't know what & it makes me feel stymied.)

One thing to note.  Usually, I'm more or less a mess at this point after the holidays.  I did pull back on a LOT this year.  And, as of right now, (even though I don't want to jinx it,) I think it's worth noting, that I'm more or less holding it together.  (knockingonwood)  One thing I do know is that I really, really need to listen to my body.  If it's telling me it's too tired, it's too tired.  I'm not going to get a 2nd wind.  That's just not how it works for someone like me. (Someone w/Fibromyalgia.)  I'm a slow learner, but I'm getting better at listening to my body and heeding the warnings it gives me.  Maybe, THAT is key to all of this & I just need to be patient and see how it all unfolds.

Christmas Chaos (No More?)

 
I'm a big proponent of the less is more philosophy, but was raised in a "more is more" household.  That's not to say I don't appreciate all that I have or was given, because I do.  A couple years ago, I got fed up with all the "expectations" of what we should do and who we need to see and exchange gifts with.  I wasn't alone & luckily, my SIL and I were able to convince my mom to make some changes.  We stopped doing the Christmas day race; open gifts at home, race to g'mas to open more gifts, quickly put away all gifts & clean up bc guests were coming for early dinner, while being yelled at to hurry up.  Screw that.  We now celebrate/open gift w/G'parents a day or two before Christmas.  We nosh on tapas that everyone contributes and can take our time to open & appreciate what we've received.  It's a much better way to go.  Christmas morning is just our immediate family, so we can sit around in our pjs all morning and enjoy our time together.  This year, we even had Christmas Eve "off" as the hosts of the dinner we usually attend have moved a few hours away.  We decided to opt out bc we didn't want the kids to be up too late.  We were thinking we'd drive around to see the Christmas lights at some of the more dedicated homes in our area.  Instead, we had an impromptu dinner w/neighbors.  Turned out to be one of the best Christmas Eve's ever.  Kids all played together, I made mulled wine & we got properly tossed.  Very fun.  My folks even toned down the gifts this year.  They spent the same amount as usual, (I'm sure,) but when w/the focus on quality instead of quantity.  In the past, the kids have gotten "present fatigue."  This year was pretty much right on.  After opening gifts, all the cousins piled into a back bedroom to play.  They played some with their new gifts, but really, they played with each other.  They get it too, the part of this really being about having fun together.

For many years now, we've gone to see the Nutcracker Ballet.  This year, the Girl Scouts took care of that one for me.  We had a tour of the theater; including the back stage, large props (& how they work,) old costumes and practice stage.  Then we had a hour to eat dinner and then all watched the ballet together.  It was a late night, but the girls really loved it, and it was fun to go with our friends as well.

Christmas in the Park is another tradition we try to take part in every year.  Unfortunately, I got sick the week school got out.  My parents took pity on me (or maybe on my girls,) and took them to go see the event one evening.  (It's way more fun at night.) Not only did my kids get to do the Park at night, (like they wanted.) I was free to curl up on the couch with a blanket and not feel bad about feeling bad. 

We added something new this year.  New for my girls, but sort of a revived tradition for myself.  When I was a kid we would head up to Union Square in San Francisco every December to go see the store windows.   It's crowded and parking is lousy and forget it, if the weather isn't cooperating.  This year I was offered tickets to see "The Grinch, The Musical."  I thought the girls might really like it, so I said yes and invited my mom to join us.  The day of, I was kicking myself for getting us involved in it.  I had tons still to do and had no business driving up to The City.  The musical was awesome and my girls LOVED it.  In hindsight, I'm really glad we went.  The weather was perfect, we got their early, and got nearby parking.  We had time to see some of the store windows and each lunch before the performance.  We had ice cream at Macy's after and when we came out, the Christmas tree was lit up.  It really was a fun day.  I believe it's going to be added to the list of traditions that will continue on each year.

Lastly, one of the big traditions my mom has been big on continuing is Christmas baking.  I have the best kitchen set up for all of us to do this together, so it's at my house.  The day before, I mentioned to DaddySpeak that we were baking at our house & to say he was not pleased, might be a bit of an understatement.  He then voiced that his concern was that I'm always a wreak after we're done.  If it were just the baking or just the cleanup, I'd probably be ok, but all of it together does me in.  I realized he was right.  It was silly of me to kill myself for baked goods that will probably mostly get tossed anyway.  I'd already purchased a gingerbread village, so the girls could decorate, because decorating is really what they're most intersted in doing.  So, I decided not to bake.  I think it might not have been something my mom was thrilled about. But you know what?  I was fine.  I helped the girls with decorating their houses.  I helped my  mom & SIL w/their cookies.  And guess what? I was ok that night & the next day.  Totally doing that again.  One of the smartest moves I've made yet.  For the neighbors we usually exchange baked good with; I printed up 5x7s of their kids that I'd taken over the year & wrote in their cards, "Some people bake, I take pictures."  I got personal thank yous from each of them, so I think it was a hit.

I took a lot on, with being the room mom for LittleSpeak's class.  But I did manage to pace myself this year.  The kids still got to do everything they wanted. And I'm not a complete loss now.  In fact, today we all went bike riding, as a family.  Someone remind me to read this in October next year. This has been a great way to end this year.

Not Quite a Train Wreck & Happy Halloween!

We have a Rainbow Fairy & a Pirate this year.

Last Saturday, was our school's big fundraiser.  We actually only have one, so saying it's "big" is somewhat redundant.  It's a Fall Festival, which includes a costume parade, carnival games, inflatables, food; including a chili cook-off & cake decorating, a haunted house, and silent auction.  I think I missed a few things, but you get the idea.  It's a BIG. FREAKING. DEAL.  Each class puts together a "basket" for the silent auction.  This task is put on the room parent...and now you know where I'm going with this one.  LittleSpeak's class did something fairly low-key; we decorated a tote w/all the kids hand-prints and had each child bring in a new copy of a favorite book.  I put together a list of the books as a 'book-club' recommended reading list, and we included gift-certificates to Barnes & Nobel and Starbucks.  It wasn't a huge deal and I had lots of help, so it seemed mundane.  I, sort of, blew it on the day of HFN.  I volunteered to pass out pre-paid tickets/bracelets from 1-3.  The parade, which kicks off the event, starts at 4.  I thought I was so smart, getting my volunteer hours before the actual event.  I did not, however, consider the fact that I was going to be at the school from 1 in the afternoon.  So, at 3, DaddySpeak, brought the girls over to the school so I could apply "make-up" and finishing touches on their costumes.  Everything went well.  The girls had a blast, the school raised tons of money.  (We personally "won" 3 of the baskets, which means I have more than done my part for the school this year.  AND quite possibly I've finished some of my Christmas shopping.)
By 8 PM though, we were shot.  We walked home, put the girls to bed and collapsed on the couch.  Big was supposed to go to CCD at 8:30, but I couldn't get her to wake up.  I could've forced the issue w/her, but I could see she was in the middle of a dream.  I decided she needed sleep more than religion that morning.  The fact that my whole body felt like it had been run over might have contributed to that decision.  The short version; I overdid it and spent my Sunday in bed.  More details?  I used up most of my spoons for the week.  Sadly, quite a few things like dentist & doctor visits had been pushed to this week bc we were so busy leading up to the event. 
We made our appointments, but lets just say I wasn't winning any beauty contests this week.  Sweats and baseball hats were the wardrobe rule, and anything I could schedule out, (working in classrooms,) walking in the morning, grocery shopping, cooking diner, etc...was put off.  I did not win any domestic medals this week.  I need to remember to pad my week after events like this.  I tend to get burned by this kind of stuff.  You'd think I'd remember, but it's like my brain loses those part of the memories.  We survived.  The house, laundry and food situation could be better.  But honestly, they've been worse, (not that I'm proud of that).

I started to write this post on Wednesday of this week.  It was supposed to be about what a mess I was this week.  And I was, a mess.  But now that I'm at the next weekend, I'm actually able to be more objective about it.  Yeah, no one is putting the merits of my domestic skills in a magazine.  But I got the stuff done, I had to.  I listened to my body and rested when I could.  And I had enough stuff in the freezer and with leftovers that we, (Daddy,) made a decent dinner for all each night.  So instead of being a train wreak, maybe I'm just a car accident?  (KNOCK ON WOOD!) I guess that's progress, right?

Over Done, Merry Effing X-mas

I'm over done.
I'm sort of in the middle of a tantrum of my own, I guess, but I've been bottling up all these feelings for some time now (why I haven't written) and now they've accumulated till there's no more room for them.
I'm feeling overwhelmed as we're dealing with the third round of lice in the girls. I literally spent my entire day yesterday and today, treating the girls & brushing them out. I haven't even done the whole wipe down, clean out the whole house thing because I just can't wrap my head around it. But it's hanging over my head that I need to do it, or I will be dealing with round #4 of this, at which point I'm considering fire bombing the damn house.

Yesterday, we did Christmas gifts w/my family. The girls were thrilled, as they received what they were hoping Santa would bring, (American Girl dolls,) but from my parents. Honestly, that's really all I care about, that they're happy. But, I'd be lying if I didn't admit I was left feeling like a major afterthought. For some reason, my mom decided that I would like what my SIL wanted for Christmas. So, pretty much, she gave me duplicates to what she bought my SIL. My SIL & I don't buy for each other, so haven't seen her list. I'm assuming that she wanted the things we were given. Maybe she's thinking the same thing as me. What I do know, is that of the presents I received, 3 were things I already had, and 1 was something I won't use. I don't want to sound ungrateful, and I know that's how this is sounding, it's just another straw added to my stress level, and the camel's back broke ages ago. It just made me feel like crap. Several years ago my family created electronic lists, so there was no question as to what people wanted for birthdays & Christmas. I updated my list, but no one seems to have actually looked at it. OK, that's not true, I did get a bathrobe (from my parents,) I wanted for my birthday. But otherwise, no. My husband got me a outdoor light for my birthday, no, I did NOT ask for it. I mentioned this summer when we had the house painted, that now we needed a new light & mailbox for the porch. I did not put it on any personal lists. I did not consider it something that I would've give to my husband as a gift, as it's something for the house, not the person. Now, my folks have joined the foray with their effort at Christmas, and it just made me feel like crap.
Yes, I'm totally having a pity party. Yes, I'm being a baby & throwing a tantrum of sorts. I get it, I need to put on my big girl panties and move on. It's just been a nonstop barrage of Fibro symptoms, and fire drills (read: lice infestation) and I'm feeling very over worked, overwhelmed and under appreciated. I know much of this is an emotional reaction to the lack of sleep & pain I'm dealing with, but it doesn't make me want to cry any less just because I know the rational side of what's wrong with me.
Tonight, when DaddySpeak got home early from work, I suggested we get Subway & go see the lights in the park in Los Gatos. Yes, it will be a long line, but we're free tonight & the girls would like it. He said no. He said it was because sitting in the car like that is bad for my back, but I know the real truth is that he hates being in the car like that. He can say what he wants, but that's the truth and he knows it. I was in the middle of my FOUR HOUR hair routine w/the girls at the time, so him coming in and telling me I'm doing it wrong didn't improve my mood so much either. I told him to knock himself out & finish, so he did. When done, he wanted to know what was up for dinner. I told him I had put forth my suggestion & been shot down, so he could do it. I did suggest some food I had in the kitchen, but the girls wanted pizza and worked him over. I'm supposed to be getting on my low carb diet which, is sort of a joke, (I've been stress eating so much chocolate, I'm pretty sure I've gained all the weight back I just lost,) but I opted out. So they went out to dinner. I'm sure they were probably relieved to get away from me. I'm such a freaking bitch right now, I wouldn't want to be around me either.
So I'm going to go frolic with all the last min shoppers & see if I can't get my ass run over in a mall parking lot or something, because, clearly I hate myself. (Why else would one go shopping tonight?) I have a couple last minute things I need to get for the girls and him. Not deal breakers, but things I haven't been able to get because of sick kids, sick me, and now school's out.

Wordless Wednesday - Halloween Edition

I know I've been MIA. I'll write more about it later. It's because of Fibro, so it's a downer, not to mention that Fibro makes me down, so I'm a party. Woo! Anywho, as usual, can't keep my mouth shut on a Wordless post. I'm nothing, if not consistent. Providing some eye candy is better than listening to me complain, no?

A True Anniversary...No Joke

Today is April Fools. This is one of my favorite days of the year.


It was on this day 10 years ago,
my husband proposed to me

It was on this day 10 years ago,
I told him, "Yes, I would spend the rest of my life with him."

And it was on this day, 10 years ago,
our "marriage" began.

In my heart, I believe that the day he asked and I accepted, that was the day we were married.

That is the day that truly matters to me. The wedding day, the wedding itself; gravy.
A celebration with others of our love for each other. An official ceremony to declare ourselves to each other. A piece of paper recognizing that love by the government. That day, May 26, is very important too.

But April First, will always be the real beginning of my marriage.

This year is the first time in 10 years that DaddySpeak and I have been apart on our engagement anniversary. He's sailing with the menfolk of the family in the Bahamas. I'm fine with the fact that he's on the trip. I'm happy he got to take the trip, (though I admit I'd be happier for him if I was on the trip with him.) But today I'm sad and missing him, more than most days.

Happy Blogiversary!

I've never written about my "blogiversary" before. I always forget & then it's past & who really cares, right? But this year I remembered, before it happened, which means I do care this year. January 2, 2010 is my blog's 4 year anniversary. Hard to believe I've been writing for that long. When I started blogging, I picked blogger, because if was the magical price of FREE! I wasn't sure I'd stick w/it. I figured I'd give it a year or two & then I'd get a site where I could make all kinds of updates & such. This was supposed to be my starter blog. LOL. Four years later I'm still here, and the site looks more or less the same. What a surprise! When I started this, we had just moved into the house we're in now. I was pregnant, so LittleSpeak wasn't even born yet. I worked outside of our home. And my scrapbook pages were all physical! So, a lot about & around me has changed, even if I am too lazy to update the layout of my website.

This week is probably not the best for me to "take stock" of where I am & what I'm doing. I admit I'm a bit depressed right now. My back has been really bad this week & I've been taking it easy, but I'm still ending up having to take medication to help me with the pain. I'm frustrated and overwhelmed and I'm angry. I thought after my surgery last year, my back pain would go away. That a year later, I would most certainly be able to run & ride bikes w/my kids. That unloading the dishwasher wouldn't be the extent of "a good day" any more. And I'm not there yet. The way things have been this week, I'm not even close. I not asking to run a marathon, but I would like to be able to ride my bike around the block and not spend the next two days in bed. Soooo, that's where I'm at right now. One of those situations where you ask someone how they are, and they actually tell you. Opps! Yeah, I'm that person. I know, I'll get back into the doctor. I'll get a game plan & I'll work on this. I also know you Interwebs, will be there to help support me, as you have been this past four years. Right now, I'm just wallowing in my pity party.

While I am being Grumpy McPooperpants, I did take a look at a couple of my original posts. Cringe. (My spelling & grammar is worse than it is now, so don't go look.) I did take the opportunity to reflect a little on the past four years, and how my blog has impacted my life. I realize that I'm very grateful for my blog. I know it's helped to keep my sanity and give me a place to vent. And it's a lot cheaper than a shrink. This last year in particular, I've made some incredible friends & been offered some really cool opportunities. My "social networking" may drive my family crazy, but it's something I've ALWAYS done to some degree. Now there's a name for the thing I do best, and a tribe of people, just like me. Between FaceBook, Twitter, mommyspeak & Silicon Valley Mom's I've found my groove. I'm very lucky to have you Interwebs, life would be much less fun without you. The best part of all of this, (blogging/social networking) is that I've made some really good friends. I've met several in real life even! And have plans to meet several more this next year. These friends, those opportunities, none of that would've happened if not for this little ol'blog of mine. So in looking forward I'm expecting many more positive things, and lots of blog fodder from the negative. Happy New Year 2010!

Christmas Times 2

My back has slowly, but surely been improving. An item of note is that it's responding to ibuprofen. That's huge deal. It means that whatever is going on in there is swollen & the ibuprofen is knocking it down. It helps a lot to know how to make something better. Whole light at the end of the tunnel and all, you know.

So I've been taking it easy. Hasn't been that hard, it's been raining, so we've been hanging out in the house. Girls are playing with their new toys & I'm only getting on them once or twice a day to clean a path, so no one gets hurt. Both girls are game players now, so we've been doing lots of that. It's been fun. Last night we're sitting around in the family room playing games & the TV made this HUGE pop noise. Loud like a firecracker, but quicker. Oh, and the TV went black. After some investigation we determined that the TV had died. I started to Google our TV brand (Vizio) and the drop down suggestion menu had "pop of death" as an option. Well, that sounded promising. Turns out it's a common problem, and that we were pretty much out of luck. Vizio has a warranty of 90 days on their TVs, we purchased our in April 2007. We were a bit out of warranty range. We could have it fixed, and there was lots of information about the parts we'd need & how Vizio deals with getting it fixed, etc...on the internet. However, the fix will cost between $800-$1000 and will only be warrantied for 30 days. We can buy a new TV for that cost & have a longer warranty.

So today we trudged over to Costco, if we'd bought our Vizio thru them the first go round they would've replaced it. (Information that would have been good to have prior to purchasing our last TV). We got a 46" Samsung (Sony & Samsung are the most reliable out there). Samsung offers a 1 year warranty & Costco extends the warranty two years past manufacturers. (My little PSA for you, your welcome.)

Turns out Santa came twice for my husband, he got an Apple TV on Christmas & a new TV for Boxing Day. Happy Festivus.

The Post of Christmas Past (bc I could've written this exact post a year aog.)

Wow! It's been almost two weeks. I'm not sure if that's the longest I've gone w/out posting, but if not, it's close. Those cookies I baked were practically the death of me. While my back has been much, much better since October, 7 1/2 hours on my feet baking (and a few more cleaning up after) proved to be too much for my poor vertebrae. My assumption is that the tissue in that area is inflamed, and so I'm back in pain. (Back in nerve pain. Not good.)

The last two weeks have been a blur of keeping the girls on track with school & holiday functions, shopping, wrapping, cooking, scrap booking.... I'm sure very similar to whatever hubbub your own family had going on. In the midst of it all my back has not been happy. (Much like last year, huh.) So, my blogging is what has suffered. It's unfortunate, as I've had many things I'd like to write about, but just don't have the energy. If I wasn't cramming on finishing the scrapbooks for the grandparents I probably could've pulled off a post or two, but it just wasn't in me.

Suffice to say, we have been having a very "normal" holiday time. And that is good. I was an extremely good girl, as I got a new bike from DaddySpeak. (That or he wants me to get off my fat arce! I'm going w/good girl.) My parents gave us our tickets to Hawaii for this summer (they are taking us all on a trip). Crazy of them, but I'm beyond grateful. I also got a balance board for the Wii & Raving Ravids to go with it. This is leading somewhere, can you guess? We opened gifts w/my parents Christmas Eve. Got home, put the girls to bed, blah, blah, blah...Little got up just as Santa was about to come. Ack! So to kill some time, and make sure she was really asleep, I tried out my new Wii game. It was fun as all get out. I played for about an hour I guess. Then Santa came to visit & I went to bed. Next day we did our family gifts, and hung out in pjs. I realized I wasn't going to get to play w/my bike if I didn't get moving, so I took a quick spin around the block. I haven't ridden a bike a 3 years (since I hurt my back) if not longer. I'm sure I woke up some muscles that have been sleeping for quite some time. Obviously, I'm feeling a bit better if I did these things, right? About an hour after we got to my mom's, my back went into a spasm. It did this in such a huge way, and involved so much of my back that my entire body twitched as it went into spasm. The day went down hill from there. I had my muscle relaxers w/me, so I took one. I suppose it helped some, but mostly I felt like it made me groggy. By the time we finished dinner I couldn't stand to be upright any longer. W/in an hour of that, I couldn't stand to stand, or sit, or just generally be, any more. I declared myself done & we went home. I took a vicodin & got flat. Much, much better. I went to bed & tried to get to sleep, but I could tell the vicodin was wearing off, so I took another muscle relaxer. I'm still really, really sore tonight, but I am better. Slept till noon (groggy from muscle relaxers) and did pretty much nothing all day. Got coffee w/a friend & then went to dinner w/family friends. I was actually pretty good at that. (Hello Zinfandel!) I'm still "uncomfortable", but I can at least find positions to get into now. I'm hopeful that I'm past the worst of this now, and I can get back to my usual routine. Hopefully.

Can we push Christmas out till say January 15?

I'm still alive, really!

It's been crazy & I'm not sure when it's gonna get better. Right now I'm procrastinating about cleaning the kitchen after baking for over 7 hours today. I wish I were exaggerating. My feet are killing me. Tomorrow, we have a Christmas Prayer Service at church, which Big will participate in, so no missing it. Right after the girls and I are meeting my mom, Sister-In-Law & Niece for brunch before we go to the Nutcracker. It's going to be Little's first time. I'm hoping we didn't wear her out from this weekend already. From the ballet, the girls & I will be meeting DaddySpeak at a friend's holiday/cookie party.

I'm exhausted thinking about it.

No, I haven't finished my Christmas shopping.
No, all the Christmas decorations are NOT out yet. (About half of them.)
Tree is up (yes, we got the fake one, it's gorgeous) and decorated.
Front lights are up & outside is decorated.

Please, can we push Christmas out till Jan 15? I'm pretty sure I can pull it together by then. Probably.

Things To Do This Holiday Season In Silicon Valley

So I wrote that post about some of traditions my family shares during the holidays. In the process of this, I started pulling links for, what I think is, some pretty cool stuff to do in the South Bay of Silicon Valley during the holiday season. While we live super close the the Big City, San Francisco, my family tends to stick closer to home for most of our trekking around. Luckily, there's lots to do! I'm sure there's tons more I haven't mentioned, so if you have a favorite by all means please add it in the comments. I'd love to check it out too.

Here's some of the Speak Family favorites:

• Did you know San Jose has it's own Holiday Parade? This year it's December 6, at 8:30 AM. While the best seats get taken early, you don't have to show up at dark o'clock to get a front row view of this parade. Even here in California it's cold that early, so bring something to sit on (a blanket) and dress warm. This year the Grand Marshall is Disney's Goofy!
  
• My mom, Sister-In-Law & I have an annual girls day, when we take our girls to see the Nutcracker. This will be LittleSpeak's first time, she's 3. That should be interesting. If it goes poorly, at least I have a blog post, right? We go to see the local production by Ballet San Jose. I love that we're able to support a ballet company locally. .
• We attend Christmas in the Park in Down Town San Jose every year. This is the 30th year! Usually we know several groups who decorate trees (including groups we participate in.) It's always fun to go find the trees done by our friends. The kids love the displays. And I love that it's still free, after all these years.
• We usually try to go ice skating on Down Town Ice while at Christmas in the Park. Where else can you ice skate outside, under the palm trees?
• There's always a night we drive through Fantasy of Lights in Los Gatos. This is a great way to see lots of Christmas light with minimal effort. Great if you have young kids who won't last long! (My advice, try to go on a week night. Lines on weekends are KRAZZEE long!) We put the kids in warm jammies, pack some hot coco & treats and sing Christmas Carols with the radio station that's sync'd to the displays.)
• Gilroy Gardens sponsors a month long event called Holiday Lights. Kids love it and they have ice skating & Santa too.
• Last year we spent one evening checking out the houses with best Christmas light displays nearby us. I found a great website, Lights of the Valley, where people who go all out can post their addresses and pictures. (Users of the site, rate their displays too!) It's not just for the South Bay, but all over Northern California. I had no idea how much some people do (and close to us too!) We will definitely be doing this again this year.

Traditionally the Holidays

We have lots of Christmas traditions in my family. It's comforting to have traditions. I enjoy passing them on to my girls and telling them stories of doing the same when I was a child. And, they seem to really enjoy hearing stories of mommy as a girl. Some of the traditions we share:

• If we have nice weather we will head to the Santa Cruz Mountains & cut down our tree. Growing up my family would do that regardless of weather. Yeah, that one can go out the door in the cold & rain as far as I'm concerned.
• We decorate the tree together with Christmas music. Many of the ornaments are from my husband and I's childhoods, so there will be discussion about them as they come out of the boxes; who they came from, when, why, etc... Much fuss is made over the final item; the star. Daddy lifts each girl for a turn to place it on top. At my mom's house, it's a running joke about her redoing the ornament placement on her tree after we all leave.
  
• The girls get annual advent calendars. We still get the kind that have a piece of chocolate to mark one day closer to Santa's arrival.
  
• There's an annual visit to Santa at the mall for a picture.
  
• Cookie making with my mom, sister-in-law (SIL) and now my girls & niece.
  
• We have an annual trek to take the girls to see the Nutcracker. This will be LittleSpeak's first time, so that should be interesting.
  
• Christmas Eve used to be at my Grandma's house when growing up. There was always traditional food (ham or prime rib or something) and trays of enchiladas as well as homemade tortillas, (my favorite part). After dinner there was always a cut throat game of poker. (Grandma was a card shark.) When my Grandma passed (21 years ago on this Dec 20) we started spending Christmas Eve with close family friends. They're Italian, so it was Seafood Chioppino for dinner. Yum!
  
• The girls & their cousins always get matching Christmas pjs from my folks on Thanksgiving. These are to be worn on Christmas Eve & Morning.
• We attend Christmas in the Park in Down Town San Jose. We usually try to go ice skating on Down Town Ice while there.
• We drive through Fantasy of Lights in Los Gatos.
  
• Last year we took a night to go check out the best Christmas Lights nearby us. THAT was fun!
  

This post was going to be about how I started a new tradition last year; Elf on a Shelf. But instead it's just about some of the little things we try to do that make the season special to US. I'll introduce you to our Elf in the next post. What kind of traditions does your family do?

Wordless Wednesday - Kansas Style

Girls got to go horseback riding at Papa's farm in Kansas. They were pretty pleased about the whole deal. In case the ear-to-ear grins didn't clue you in. ;-)

The Post that Became a Drinking Game

"The Proverbial Chicken" was supposed to be the title of this post. But as you can see it evolved a bit. Read on:

That would be me. The proverbial chicken, running around w/my head cut off. I know you've gotten the gist of my moaning and groaning this week. But along w/the general aches, pains, coughs, stomach- & head-aches, life has not stopped to accommodate me. Quite the contrary, it's just starting to get moving. I feel a lot like I'm barely keeping my head above water these days. Stick w/me here, I'm pretty sure I'll manage to get in several more cliches before this is done. Perhaps we could make it a drinking game, that should keep you reading. (Take two swigs!)

We are at the end of soccer season, which means this weekend is the big tournament. All soccer, all the weekend. At least 4 games, perhaps 5, I think. And, in case you've been living under a rock, (drink!) the holidays are upon us. I'm still feeling a bit floored by this, as if they've managed to sneak up on me somehow. At the end of next week we fly to Kansas for a week. (Insert obligatory "We're not in Kansas anymore" joke here. I think that one deserves a shot, it's cliche-ish, so drink!) This means I need to get to packing a weeks worth of winter clothes for all of us this week. If you're a mom, you are thinking, "that means getting all the laundry done,"aren't you? And you'd be right. Just to keep us on our toes, (drink!) the school has scheduled parent/teacher conferences this week. Parent/Teacher conferences means half days at school. All Week. I'm sure this will help greatly w/my time management. Wonder how Big feels about laundry & packing? Guess we'll find out. Don't forget the end of year soccer banquet is this weekend! I will be missing it, as I'm starting off to the Holiday Party Season by attending the SVMoms Group Holiday Party. (You will be very jealous when you see all the cool sponsors. I'm one of the mom's driving a Chevy to the party and all this week. If you follow my Tweets I'm sure you're well aware of this. I'm driving the Equinox & will be providing my review soon.)
When we get back from Kansas, it will be the first week of December, which includes my Dad & I's birthdays. (I don't want to talk about it, I'm about to be in my 40s. Not just 40, but in my 40s, and this is bothering me greatly.) Being December, everything will suddenly rocket into full speed; (drink!) there will be Christmas programs at church & both girls' schools. My family has scheduled to take the girls to see the Nutcracker one afternoon (I think we're going to go to tea too!) We have a day of baking in the schedule, a night of Caroling, several neighborhood parties and just for fun, Big will be bridging in Girl Scouts ("bridging up from a Daisy Scout to a Brownie). Somewhere in there we will get a tree. If the weather agrees, we'll make a day of it & go to the mountains to cut it down. If not, we'll have the annual Christmas trek to Home Depot. We Speak's, we're all about traditions.

I'm kinda tired just writing it all down. Seriously.

Right now, I'm still trying to catch up from my outlaws visit. You could say I'm getting wiser in my old age. Instead of stressing while they're here, I just live w/the piles while they're here and tackle them once they leave. I've learned it doesn't do me much good to try and pick up too much while they're visiting. Once I clear a space someone will start a new pile there (I wish I were joking). I figure I'm cleaning up the same amount of stuff, just all at once. But like I said, I'm still trying to wrap my head around it. (drink!) And because we work well under pressure, (drink!) we must, why else would be keep doing this to ourselves? We decided to refinance our mortgage right now. Pick up your chin off the floor, it's unbecoming. We talked about this earlier in the year, but just now have the rates gotten to the point where it's worth our while to do it. It will be worth it in the long run. (drink!) If I keep saying that, at some point I'll believe it, right? No, really, it will be worth it. We're going to pull money out to redo ALL the windows, get a new front door & add French doors in our dinning room. It will soooo be worth it. AND we're going to have a lower monthly payment. So yeah, very worth it. Though I do admit, giving up those ill-fitting, rattling windows does mean giving up some blog fodder, but I've decided I'm willing to make that sacrifice. I'm sure I'll manage to schedule the window install right in the middle of all the crazy holiday activities. That should make up for any posts I'll lose to the rattling windows, dontcha think? Today, I spent my day stressing because I COULD NOT locate 2007's tax return. The mess of the house was a lot of my stress. (This is the mess that is still here from the outlaws.) The return was missing from the file, and everything else was there, so it was misfiled. That meant it wasn't going to be anywhere logical. I also could not find it on our computer (remember my laptop crashed on me two weeks ago?) We back up our files in triplicate, (that means on 3 separate back up drives, not carbon copies) so I couldn't understand how it could be that I couldn't find it. Having Little home all day, I couldn't take the time till tonight to really delve into trying to locate it. So I was freaking out inside my head all day. Woot! I was lots of fun to be around, trust me. I did finally find it. I also found several other missing things, so I guess it wasn't a total loss. I guess.
Ok, insert appropriate pun laden cliche here, drink! and I'm headed to bed. I do have an early soccer game to get to after all. Drink!

Wordless Wednesday - Halloween Edition

I think this pretty much sums up our Halloween week, dontcha think? (This was my costume before it was caught, so my theory is that karma has no sense of humor.) And, Internets, don't say I never give you anything, cuz this is such an awful pix of me, but I posted it anyway. Cuz, I'm a giver!

Happy Halloween!

OK, really it's Dia de los Muertos (Day of the Dead)! Halloween was Kra-Zeee!!! Fun, but Krazee! We went Trick-or-Treating w/our neighbors, which meant about 20 kids. (No exaggeration!) It took us about 2 hours to basically go around the block, and the kids scored with all their loot. (And Mama & Daddy did pretty well on Trick-or-Drink, I love Halloween!) Very Mayberry USA. We had georgous weather, wore sweatshirts & jeans, and had a nearly full moon. Perfect. Not much else to say, it was perfect. Perfectly uneventful & normal.

Gong hei fat choi!!!

Happy Lunar New Year!

Does your family do anything to celebrate?
Sorry, did I confuse you? Yes, I'm wonder bread (White) over here. Actually, the side of the family I feel the most influence from is the beans & rice (Mexican/Spanish) but no, no Chinese in my background. I'll explain:

I grew up in a predominantly "Asian" area; Philippine, Vietnamese, Chinese & Japanese. I guess it might be more accurate to say I grew up in a very diverse area, but the Asian cultures were quite dominate in my schools. This was a big holiday growing up for us. We usually celebrated w/a traditional lion dance or dragon parade at school. But the best part was the food!!! We always had lumpia (Philippine egg rolls), pork baus (sweet bread stuffed w/sweet & sour pork) and pho (Vietnamese soup). YUM!!!

Night before last hubby took the girls to pick up Chinese take out. Big Speak comes home yakking away about the outing; "We went this store that had a waving cat in the window." (Funny, the things they note. I don't even notice those anymore.) "And then I told the lady Happy New Year in Chinese, and she started to talk to me in Chinese." I asked her if she understood her and she said no, but I wouldn't be surprised if Littlespeak did. (Those toddlers get so much from our non verbals it's like they speak all languages.) I then explained to her about Mandarin language and Cantonese and that they're both Chinese, but most likely the lady spoke to her in Mandarin. She thought that was cool, "how come we don't have two languages?" They're having a big "Chinese New Year" parade & celebration at her school on Thursday, so she's been preparing for this week. I explained to her that it's really Lunar New Year and why (the moon cycle, and not just the Chinese celebrate it. I've actually been in Korea during it. Trust me, they celebrate.) And she got really excited about that. She's super happy to go "tell" her teacher something new. Then I promised to get some Chinese food, as well as Vietnamese, Koren, and Philippine to celebrate (looks like I'll be making a trip to the Ranch 99 this week).

So again; does your family celebrate? How?
Do you celebrate some not so common (for America) holidays? How?

It's Going Around....

Such a fitting title for so many reasons.

Guess what?! I wasn't being a hypochondriac! No really, I had Fifth's Disease. Never heard of it? Well neither had my mom so I've been getting lots of advice from her not to mention it to people cause "it sounds just awful". So supportive, don't you think? We got a notice home from BigSpeak's school about a day before vacation started. Happy Holidays! At that time, LittleSpeak had come down with it and I'd (self-)diagnosed that this is what her and I had, had already. Thank you Dr. Google. It's pretty miserable in general, but in adults you get some added fun; joint pain for up to a month! Not to be left out, BigSpeak showed up w/the rash on December 23. So both girls and I have been run down during most of this month. (That picture w/Santa, probably at the height of our contagiousness, don't say we never gave you anything Santa!) We ended up bowing out of our Christmas Eve dinner and staying home to put the girls to bed early and eat leftovers. The house of Speak knows how to party, let me tell you.

The family illness coupled w/the busyness of the season along w/trying to get my family/house ready for my surgery equals "not much posting," you may have noticed. On the other hand, I may need to join a self-help group for my Facebook addiction. I don't actually spend as much time as it might seem on it. I leave it open all day & periodically check it/update my status while I'm in the kitchen doing other things, like cooking breakfast, etc... My extended family thinks I sit waiting for people to update their status though, so I felt the need to clarify. I feel better now, thanks. ;-)

In spite of all of this, we did manage to get in quite a bit of traditional holiday fare; caroling w/BS's girl scout troop, seeing the Nutcracker ballet, holiday parties, driving around to check out over-the-top Christmas lights, etc... but it's been hectic to say the least.

I have so many good stories from this month, I'm hopeful that during my convalesce I'll be coherent enough to share them. Go read Mike and Mir, their stories today are typical of the type I have to share with you. LittleSpeak has been up to her usual tricks and is both trying and adorable at the same time. It's amazing to me how much I can love that little bundle of energy and be just enraged by her at the same time. She is definitely the daughter my mother wished on me as a teenager: "I hope you have a daughter exactly like you!" BigSpeak has had some of her own trying moments this month as we try to work out her homework vs. play/T.V. schedule. Being a big kid is not easy. That's not to say that this month hasn't been fun, cause it has. The girls have been so much fun; they were both really into Christmas this year & that's been a treat. Sometimes I just can't get enough of them you know.

I have my surgery (microdiscectomy) on 12/30. Happy New Year! I'm supposed to have a 6 week recovery; 2 weeks of which will pretty much be flat on my back (in bed). My doctor has told me I can't really screw it up during recovery, but I certainly can prolong the recovery time. I'm not sure if the end of six week is when I can start to act like a normal person again (i.e.--walk BS the 2 blocks to school again) or if I should be back up normal by then (able to walk for 30+ minutes if I wanted to). I'm under the impression it's more the first choice, but I'll have to check on that. Hopefully, I'll be posting much more very soon, since I'm going to find myself quite stationary w/only my laptop to play with. This is most likely my last post of the year, so

Happy New Year!!!

Talk to you Next year! (Hee, yes I'm like 9 or something.)

While I was sick....

We did manage this during one of the hours I was feeling slightly ok last week: