Thursday, November 18, 2010


My brain is racing right now. Spinning doesn't begin to cover how I'm feeling. Gawd, I can't wrap my head around this, even though I've discussed with w/DaddySpeak (DS) and already know the answer. Well, basically know the answer. SEE! That's the problem. For some reason, my brain seems to think there's more to this than what I already know. I think it's my heart, screwing w/my head.

You're probably going to laugh at me. Or call me names. Imply I'm living through my kid. But I'm not. I even asked DS if he thought I was and he at least had to courtesy to lie if he thought I was doing that.

Part of it is that options presented themselves. Options I had no idea existed. Things I thought were off the table completely, so the decision was really made for us. This week, I found out some of those options exist for her and now my head is ZOOMING!

You know Big plays soccer. She's actually turned out to be a good player. She's on a good team. If you remember, I was really nervous about her being on this team because they're so good. Neither DS or I were particularly good at "team" sports. We weren't awful, but neither of us were first choice when teams got picked is what I'm saying. (Actually, that's not entirely true. I was a RAWKN kickball pitcher & always picked first or second for that game. That means my "sports career" pretty much peaked in 5th grade.) So anywho, this season their team went undefeated. Woot! Last season we came in second. Pretty much it's Big's team and this one other one, Team M that are the best teams in our league. Both are basically teams from Big's school.

Next year/season is when the girls are old enough to try out for "comp" (competitive) soccer. Big's good, but she not one of the team's stars. I would say the biggest issue she has is that she needs to be more aggressive, kind of a big issue for a competitive league. We are also aware of the horror stories about comp soccer; parents & coaches that are all about their child scoring goals/wins, traveling up and down the state for games, high-costs, etc.... Basically I'm saying that comp soccer isn't really on our radar screen. So....the coach's daughter is going to try out for comp for this Spring. She will make it, so our team is out a coach. Really, about half the team seems to plan to try out for comp. We haven't really been sure what will happen next year w/the team. Big wants to play softball for Spring and that's fine. Well it was fine. I've been saying all along, "It's too bad there isn't some way we can't take the whole team comp together." (Comp tryouts place you on a team based on that teams need & your players abilities.) A couple days ago, I got an email indicating that the team going comp together has become a possibility. We would all still have to try out, but it would be a new team and the foundation would consist primarily of players from our team and the other really good team from our league. Our current coach would be one of the coaches on this team. That news, in of itself would not have warranted much thought, except for this second thing: Big has been scouted. I know!!!! Who would've thunk???!!! Did you know they even scouted kids as young as SEVEN??? Well they do. When I first got the the email related to this news I assumed it was a form letter sent to the whole team. I figured our team & maybe a few of the other top teams in our league all probably got them. Well, I thought wrong. In a conversation w/the coach's wife (she's going to coach a softball team this season,) I mentioned the letter. We discussing scheduling and such. She asked me to clarify the letter, which I did. She informed me that only 6 girls from the team received this letter. WhatyoutalkingboutWillis? No, this does not at all indicate that Big would be picked to play on a comp team. No, this is not the comp team or league her current coach would be coaching. But just the fact that Mah Kid Haz Skillzz is blowing me out of the water. Look, it's not like I don't think my kid is a good player, because I do. I totally do! I just assumed that my view is a little skewed, being that she is my kid and all. This letter told me, no it wasn't just me. She may or may not be a great player and no she isn't the team "star", but she does has something that someone who knows about these things noticed. That is no small thing.
Why is my head spinning about this then? Well, Big wants to play softball this spring. She has made that very clear. Tryouts for this comp soccer team are yearly in Dec. I feel like she has her best chance to make the team if she gets in on the ground floor. Now. I know a lot of what she likes about playing is related to her team; the girls and the coaches. Most of her friends and coaches are going to be doing this comp team and will most likely be able to stay together. I think if she doesn't do this now, in a year or sooner, she will be disappointed. With a different coach I'm not sure she'll continue to develop as well. I'm just so torn. I wonder if I should push a little to see if I can get her to try out, see how she likes it. She can always quit later, right? But at the same time, I don't want to be the mom who is pushing too hard.

I just feel like she's got a really unique opportunity here. I think this opportunity will probably not be there for her if she let's it pass her by right now. But I don't know how to convey that to her. It's her decision, I just don't know how to explain all the cards that are in her hand. THAT is why my head is spinning.
No, I have not, nor will I be informing her about the scout letter. I want her to play because she wants to. I just really want her to want this I guess.