Tuesday, January 31, 2006
My SIL came home to an interesting surprise from our little weekend. Lucky her! I personally have been the recipient of one too many of these types of surprises, not from any animals that are currently alive and no Internet, that’s not why said animal is deal. Although I’ve been informed that others would’ve have killed over less. It’s no fun. But it’s a funny story when it happens to someone else. Hey, it’s not like it’s a secret that I have warped sense of humor.
I was all set to tell you how I think my Fibro is not really in remission this pregnancy and probably wasn’t last either, I’m just less tolerant of it since I’d gotten onto meds that were working. But it’s so boring. I almost fell asleep writing it, so I erased it. So, I'll save you the trouble & I’m off to watch Jon Stewart, (yeah TiVO) it’s where I get all my news you know.
Sunday, January 29, 2006
Wednesday, January 25, 2006
Merit is blk/wht & Mowry is all blk. I'm the one in the middle. Save it. This was taken in the Fall 2002.
Tuesday, January 24, 2006
Daddyspeak (DS) had a work dinner tonight, so Toddlerspeak (TS) and I were on our own. As it worked out my SIL was also was having a “girls night” so we took the girls to Fresh Chunks for dinner. It was fun. TS & her cousin loved it. But man, after we got home, getting TS into bed was such a freak'n process. She was all wound up from being with her cousin, so she was pulling all the stops to prolong it. (I want to pick my PJs, not those, these, no those. I need to go to the baffroom again. I need some water. etc…) By the time I got her into bed I was exhausted. I don’t envy any of those single parents out there that’s for sure. I’m sure I had something funny, even witty to share before all of that. But now I’m just tired.
It’s times like this when I wonder what we were thinking by starting on #2. I don’t question our decision over the big stuff, not even the minor major stuff (like say the volcanic tantrum we had last night). Somehow, that stuff you get through and it’s not as exhausting. I guess you expect it on that stuff. It’s the part where the day-to-day just makes you so damn tired, that’s when I wonder "What the heck I was thinking? How on earth am I going to pull this off?" I know it’s mostly the hormones talking right now. When I finally get her into bed and get that hug from those perfect little arms that now fit around my neck, then I remember why we’re taking it on. And it is all worth it.
I love this pix of her. This is from Oct. 05. She's showing off for DS, twirling while he tells her how beautiful she looks.
So tell me, why do you think they call it Bi-Polar?
They should just call it Toddler.
Monday, January 23, 2006
Turns out my card has been “compromised”. WTF! (You mean, someone took my card on a date, got it drunk & took advantage of it???? Well, just got it drunk, the room mates stepped in & got her home before she went home with the jerk.) Apparently, I used it somewhere and they realized that all the cards during a certain time period were stolen, mine included. Nice, huh? So my card, online banking, etc…all blocked. Now I have to wait for a new bank card (5-7 days). 5-7 days is an eternity for someone who rarely carries more then $5 in her wallet & visits Starbucks several times a day. helllo??? Who are these people who decide the time frame for a new card is 5-7 days???? How the hell do they get anything done w/out their ATM cards for that length of time??? I got them to unblock it for an hour so I could run out at ten o’clock at night, make a deposit, take out cash and get gas (I'm sure I scared the crap out of that gas station attendant) to cover my arce for the next 5-7 days. Jeez I hate this kind of crap! I was thinking I had missed this too!
The whole point of keeping this blog is to let me vent, so I can’t imagine I’ll be holding back now. I’m sure it will make for some interesting conversations at some point (at home & on the internet). Especially when I get into venting about his family, which I’m sure will go over huge. I know he’ll enjoy the venting over my family. Let’s hope he loses interest quickly. It is basketball season after all.
On another note; I found out a friend had the caffeine issue during pregnancy too. Meaning that her doctor ended up telling her to drink it too, for similar reasons. (I forget to drink some on Saturday, so by Sunday noon I was getting another one of those headaches & dizzy spells. I promptly drove to Starbucks—doctor’s orders!) Guess I’m not a total freak of nature. Maybe we’re like the kids in X-Men; we’re the evolved part of the species, (or our unborn children are) and everyone else just hasn’t caught up yet. I wonder what cool X-Men type name they’d give us?
Friday, January 20, 2006
Thursday, January 19, 2006
“Are you sure?”
“Is this the same scale you usually weight on?”
“What were you wearing last time?”
“Chain mail mom, I was wearing chain mail the last time I weighed myself.”
On a side note: At the doctor’s I found that I’d lost the 2 lbs I’d previously gained. (And I have a good weight story I’ll write about later.)
So, what ploy do you think I should use to get my doctor to tell me start eating sushi? =)
Tuesday, January 17, 2006
Monday, January 16, 2006
I was hoping to have some great pix to share, but in true toddler fashion we took like 50 pix and really NOT ONE of them came out all that hot. But just so you don’t think I’m making her up here’s a gratuitous kid shot (stunning or not).
Saturday, January 14, 2006
Friday, January 13, 2006
So now that we moved we don’t live around the block from the daycare. It’s not totally out of the way, but as I pass about 10 centers on my way to this one and I do feel a small amount of frustration toward it during those times. Daddyspeak and I figured we’d wait to change her daycare until she turned 3. Figured we put her in preschool with extended care at that point and since it’s only 6 months away, no big deal, right? Well a new baby is arriving at that same time. Hmmm, what to do? If the change in schools isn’t as positive as hope for we don’t want her to think that we’ve made the change related to the baby and then have her blame it on the baby. I’m sure there’s plenty of stuff she can blame on the baby w/out us adding to it. She’s not completely potty trained yet so we can’t put her a preschool yet.
I found a “school” by the house that I really like. But it’s not as structured as a true preschool. In a lot of respects it’s not much different from what she’s in now. It’s bigger (it’s not shiny and new, but it’s close), the student/teacher ratios are really good, they have these cool science, music, art, etc…programs, they feed them (I think that’s a big plus—currently we have parents who send their kids w/donuts for breakfast. Don’t get me wrong; donuts are ok once in a while. But this is what that kid has every Friday for breakfast and it’s not like a party so the other kids get some. It’s not even Krispy Kreme for Christ Sake!) But they don’t do the preschool stuff till age 4 (pre-K). Because she’s mixed w/the bigger kids at this current school she is getting some of that now. So I’m feeling really unsure about it. I ended up going to see a couple other schools to see if this is the norm, (the pre-K thing) and it is. I’m torn. Should I wait and keep her where she is until say September? Should I move her and make my commute easier? Am I potentially limiting her education potential so I can have better commute??? I really only want to make this move once. I don’t want to move her now and then move her again in September. Am I worrying about a non-issue? ACK! I need a mocha.
Thursday, January 12, 2006
SOOO, I suggested SF Zoo. Got on their website and am now all excited at the prospect of taking Toddlerspeak (TS) to go see it. She’s been to a couple Zoos before; a local petting zoo (she’s actually scared to feed the animals herself) which has been there since I was a kid. It’s ok, but it’s a petting zoo and it's kinda old, etc... And we took her to the Topeka Zoo when visiting the outlaws last Thanksgiving (2003). They were thrilled to get to take her, and very high on their local zoo. (They had apparently been involved w/fundraising & such to help get a lion exhibit going in the 80s.) Honestly, it was pretty depressing. I’m not huge on “caged” animals to begin with, and since there was snow on the ground (remind me again why we were at an outdoor venue in November, IN THE MIDWEST????) It as so cold that the animals were mostly hanging out in this one big building (and it wasn't really all that big). Basically they were each in a kind of kennel and it was really kind of sad (think giraffe in kennel, need I say more?). But the worst part was the crazy lion at the lion exhibit. She just kept pacing by the fence. Even the kids could tell she was off her rocker. Very depressing (as if Topeka isn’t depressing enough on it’s own, but that's another story for another time).
Hopefully the SF Zoo will be in better shape. And even if the weather sucks, the animals are still outside in an area the feels like an open space.
I started thinking about what else we could do to go be local tourists and came up w/a New Year's resolution. "We need to be local tourists at least once a month. " A couple years ago we made a similar resolution to go to the beach at least once a month (Daddyspeak’s family owns a home on the beach which is approximately 20 minutes from us.) And it worked out really well. We really enjoyed the place, and we need to get back into that groove too.
Wednesday, January 11, 2006
I also screwed up reading my calendar and I’m not supposed to meet my friend for dinner until till next week. (So I could've picked up TS from G'mas) Nice, huh? I guess I should be glad I realized it this afternoon, instead of while waiting at the table by myself for half an hour. The kind of night I’m having I guess.
I'm going to have a mocha & a chocolate brownie cookie, I think I need it.
Most of the day I was borderline tears (often not borderline) over the whole dog thing. (I’ll tell you more about that in a minute.) I made the mistake of bringing it up to my mother (not the most sympathetic of people,) “it’s only a dog”. Yeah, I’m only your daughter that doesn’t seem to stop you form making me feel like crap. Anyway, in that conversation I asked if Toddlerspeak (TS) could spend the night. I was going to dinner with a friend the next day after work and that way Daddyspeak (DS) & I could switch cars in the morning (we only have one car seat) instead of having to work it out during the day. G’ma said ok. So that meant I had the evening off! I knew exactly what I was going to do with the time; paint TS’s room! In our old house she had the cutest room on earth!
I wasn’t sure what I wanted to do in her room when we first moved in, so I just had it painted yellow. Yellow-we (TS and I) are pink girls, so yellow wasn’t going to cut it, but I figured this way I could do pink accents. I finally decided I wanted it to have these scallops painted on the top border, but now we were moved in and I needed a window when TS wasn’t going to be around to help. It came out so good! I can’t hardly stand it! While doing this I was be-bopping around the room, so pleased with how it was coming out. (That was about half way through).
But at 11 last night, w/my hands falling asleep from the position they were in while painting, I was losing steam. So then I got frustrated that DS won’t help at all with this kind of thing. Cause if he was helping I'd be done, and then my neck, and stomach and hands wouldn't be hurting and yes, I know I'm sounding very hormal, but this is what was going through my mind at the time. I could’ve really used his help moving everything (furniture) around. I am 5.5 months pregnant you know.
Then, for some unknown reason I checked my email before I went to bed. There was a message about the dog. They will help us find a home for him. But we’d have to foster him and the dogs they currently have like this have been listed since last JULY! I can’t put myself through this for the next 6+ months. So I burst into tears again.
I slept like crap and woke up w/a neck and headache. Go Figure.
Monday, January 09, 2006
Toddlerspeak (TS) and I started out the morning w/speech therapy (for her. I know my spelling and grammar suck, but they typically don’t send adults to speech therapy for it. They figure we’re lost causes by this point.) We were early, yes I said early. So early that I ended up driving past the building and going to the bank to make a deposit because I had the time. And we still sat in the waiting room for 15 minutes. (This has never happened before, and probably won’t ever happen again.) What this means is that TS got up, ate breakfast & got dressed in a relatively cooperative manner before we ever got out the door. After speech (which she did great in) we went to get a badly needed haircut. (Her again, not me. I need one, but I get mine from a salon thank you very much. I have hair issues. It’ll come up at some point, don’t worry.) Anyway, she was super good and the lady at the shop gave her a crappy little makeup kit for being so damn good. I’m pleased she was so well behaved. I’m not excited my daughter has been given lip gloss from China. I’m sure it’s toxic. She was thrilled, of course.
Then we went to the shoe store to get her new shoes. The kid’s feet grow so fast they may actually be setting some records. She also has EXTRA WIDE feet, so no cheapy Target shoes for her (they don’t carry wide, much less EXTRA WIDE). No, we have to pony up for the $40+ brand names (Stride Rite, Teva, Jumping Jacks, Merrell, North Face, etc..) at a specialty store. Yes, TS has more expensive shoes then her mommy. Easily more expensive, as I’ve taken to shopping at Target & Payless Shoe Source when I do buy shoes. And from the sorry state most of my shoes are in, I obviously don’t do this very often.
After that, even though it was lunch time I went to two more stores in the mall (opposite end of course) and made some exchanges. And she was like Miss Happy the whole time! She was saying “Hi!” to everyone and dancing around in her stroller. (She was staying in her stroller!) So I completely pushed my luck (let's face it, there’s nothing like watching a 2-year old have meltdown in a restaurant because her mother waited a bit too long to feed her and now she just can’t deal cause her blood sugar is low,) and took her to Fresh Choice for lunch. She was a complete ANGEL! She ate all of her lunch (and some of mine). She sat in the booth and be-bopped to the overhead muzak while she ate. And then she went potty in the bathroom (rather then her pants). When we got home she went down for her nap (which she is currently not taking) without a peep of protest. It was the kind of day you wish for when you’re the mom of a toddler. You actually got some things accomplished without having to kill your child in the process. I think I need to go buy a lottery ticket.
Sunday, January 08, 2006
I wrote to a dog rescue group about the Mowry predicament. I asked for their opinion about moving forward. "Should we pursue a trainer even though we aren’t really the best family for him? Aren’t we just prolonging the inevitable?" I haven’t heard back about it and I’m completely frustrated by the whole situation. I wish there was an easy answer. I wish he would quit doing stuff (like trashing parts of the yard) to make it any harder (or eaiser depending on how you look at it).
I took ToddlerSpeak (TS) to the Farmer’s Market w/a friend (H) today. Since its January I guessed that the place wouldn’t be too crowded & I let her take Pink Dolly w/the baby carrier and stroller. She thought she was the BOMB! Luckily, the crowd was on the thin side & most people thought she was adorable instead of annoying. I think she really only ran into like one person. Once she got going anything we bought had to go into her basket under her stroller. She was quite pleased with herself. Afterward, H let her help arrange some flowers she’d bought into a vase. TS was hilarious, every flower had to have a specific place to be in the arrangement. If it wasn’t just right she’d take it out & fix it. Can you say OCD? She was very cute, but I will never again be able to just put flowers in a vase now. H noted, "I can see how everything takes much longer these days." You think?
Ok, I guess I’ve ignored DS long enough. He’ll start to forget I’m pissed if I don’t go pout in front of him.
Saturday, January 07, 2006
This morning TS woke up w/her first real bad dream. (First one bad enough so that she wouldn’t put herself back to sleep and I actually had to haul my arce out of bed to comfort her. Funny how Daddyspeak (DS) always manages to sleep through these types of things.) Should I mark this in her baby book? Her rain boots were in the middle of her room (there was parade just before bed you know.) She told me they bit her and she wanted them in her closet. So I put them away. Then she wanted out of bed, so we sat in the rocking chair in her room and she informed me that her bookcase & her “pink baby” (favorite doll, and also the name she feels we should give her little sister) bit her in her dream too. Hmmmm…I’m getting the impression someone at daycare is having a biting issue. Could just be me, but hey I’m kinda physic like that. She doesn’t have any marks & when I asked her point blank she said yes someone was biting, but prompting for details results in a game. So we’ll see. I have already given her a big lecture on not biting & ramifications if she does. She such a rule-follower, hopefully this kid will steer clear of her, because I’m pretty sure she won’t bite back (which is what I’ll do if the terror lays one tooth on my kid). She wasn’t going back to bed so we’ve been up since 6 AM—which is the freaking middle of the night in my book (on a Saturday).
Right now I’m listening to her not napping. We have a 1st b-day party to go to this afternoon (during her usual naptime.) No nap, coupled w/being up since the crack of dawn should make for a great time I’m sure (don’t forget to throw in the sugar buzz & resulting hangover to make it real fun!) The other big excitement for today (I said I was going to write more about my kid—won’t you be so glad now.) We’ve had 3 accidents (a particularly offensive one was cleaned by DS –karma; for sleeping through the whole bad dream thing I’m sure). And I’m having dizzy spells, so I’ve been particularly ineffective today. Excitement central here.
Friday, January 06, 2006
MERIT (April 2001) (Merit was born sometime in September 1999, so she’s currently 6.)
I started w/Merit. I worked at an ad company at the time and they had a dog policy. I know, most companies have a dog policy, which is “don't bring them to work”. Our policy was to bring them on in. I had bought a condo w/a small yard the year before and felt that if I could bring the animal to work with me then it wasn't irresponsible to get a medium sized dog. Merit is a border collie/beagle mix (at least that’s the info we got on her). She’s super socialized and we dubbed her “The Princess”. She’s smart enough to understand her boundaries and just how close she can get to crossing them. She’s spoiled and knows it. And in most respects she’s really my first baby. I adopted her about a month before DS and I got engaged. I asked him to go with me when I went to the shelter, but he declined and a good friend from work (who is a dog person) went with me. I remember my friend was like, “How can you just go pick a dog out like that?” He felt you needed to research the breed, etc…I agree to a point. But I also remember telling him, “If my dog is there, she’ll pick me.” (I knew I wanted a female.) He thought I was so weird. But I was right. We saw Merit and took her into the greeting yard. My friend & I sat on this bench they had there. She came over to me and stood there wagging her tail, like asking permission to greet me. I patted my chest, like come on up and she promptly put both paws on my shoulders and nuzzled my neck. Basically she gave me a doggie hug. I know now that that she’s actually pretty stingy w/the dog hugs, so I was right. She let me know I was hers. A family who said she was too hyper had brought her to the shelter, but really she just had puppy energy issues. She loved coming to work with me and it was a very rude awakening for her and I when I had to change jobs and no longer got to bring her.
MOWRY (October 2002) (Mowry was born sometime in March 2002. He is currently 3.)
So a year and a half later, my brother’s family gets a dog. His wife (who really hasn’t owned a dog before) wants a “puppy that will be a big dog.” Having had a Lab growing up we (my family) all told her she was loony, but she insisted. They got a Lab/Border Collie mix and named him Mowry. He was about 6 months old. He promptly dug up their yard and chewed up bunch of lawn furniture. My SIL freaked out. A lot of Mowry’s issue at that time was puppy stuff and being a Lab mix meant he had a lot of energy to do it with. Merit and he had had a couple of play dates and got along pretty well. So when it became apparent that they were not going to keep this dog we told them to bring him over. We figured we’d foster him and contact a local rescue group to help find him a home. (We would now be his fourth home in his first year of life.) We immediately enrolled him in obedience school and thought, if we can get him trained like Merit it would be a great for them to have each other (since we both have to work during the day). And Mowry has made great progress. But he has issues.
He’s a chronic barker. We finally had to get him an electronic bark collar. Not the basic kind you get at Petco or something either. We had to graduate to hunting one (which is serious, trust me). I don’t need to hear the debate on this one. I’m not a huge proponent of them, but we had literally tried everything else leading up to this. We were down to either this, debarking (which I think less of) or getting rid of him. There are a handful of animals that these are appropriate for and he is one of them. He will literally stand in the middle of the yard and bark at nothing for HOURS. He did it two weeks ago when the battery died on his collar. I thought I was going to have nervous breakdown. Our old neighbors had us cited over this, so we had to do something.
He used to be a chewer, and digger, but (knock on wood) he seems to have outgrown these behaviors. His other big issue is that he won’t be confined. (Something they tell you to do with chronic barkers.) First, he broke out the front of an airplane crate (he was crate trained at one time). He broke the lock on it and then bent the wiring. My husband fixed it with rebar. So the dog chewed out the plastic in the back of it. (Have you seen the plastic on these things—this was no small feat. I would not have believed an animal could’ve done this if I hadn’t seen it.) His mouth was a bloody mess. I felt so bad that he felt so panicked that way. That was the end of crating him. We’ve build “dog-runs” in both of our yards (we just moved to a new house in November). But it turns out Mowry can jump the gates on these. He seems content to stay in the main yard for now (but based on past experience I’m not counting on that lasting). Needless, we are feeling very at the end of our rope on this one. There are a bunch of other smaller issues. This post is already so long I’m not going to go through them, but they’re notable in the fact that make us realize that Mowry’s real issue is severe separation anxiety. We had a discussion last night about finally calling that rescue group to have him placed with another family. I pulled up info on it today and turned into a basket case over it. I just feel like no one else will put this kind of effort into him and he’s going to end up being put down. He’s only 3 and he’s not a bad dog, he just needs a lot of attention. I don’t think we’re really the right family for him, we work and can’t exercise him enough. We’re about to have another kid and he doesn’t deal well with these types of transitions. But if we’re willing to put in the money and effort does that make us the right family? We understand our limitations, and the reality is that we have them—are we the right family for him? Is it fair to us (as a family) to constantly be dealing with this stuff? (The neighbors, fixing fences, etc…) I know we took him on and I’m not complaining, but it does create an additional level of stress on our family and it’s not far to the family either.
It’s so hard to know what to do. I really think he belongs with a family who has a significant yard, (like out in the country,) a SAHM and preferably has a couple of boys ages 8-12 who will help keep him occupied and tire him out regularly. But this family would have to be really committed to him. Moving him to another family will make his anxiety worse for some time. That’s what scares me. I just don’t know what do to about it anymore.
Thursday, January 05, 2006
Ok, so far I've done nothing but bitch on this. Very compelling I’m sure. And it’s a “mommy blog” and I haven’t yet written or posted anything about my kid. Hey, I’m on a roll. I guess I should preface this by saying that
1) I think this is my new version of therapy (and it’s much cheaper then the real thing—I know,) so I don’t have to write about my kid(s) every day. Don’t worry I’ll bitch about them too.
2) I picked the name ‘mommy speak’ because I wasn’t sure what else to call this damn thing—anything else I was coming up with was either going to give out our names or at least be fairly obvious and it seemed like all the good names were already taken. I’m sure I’ll come up with several now that I’ve actually picked one.
3) I’m sure there will be amble postings of my DD (or daughters as the case will soon be) so don’t sweat it.
4) I’m 5 months pregnant & kinda cranky, need I say more?
So I guess I’ll post a pix of TS (toddlerspeak) to get the ball rolling on this one. This is the pix we used for our X-mas Cards that I amazingly got out. It was amazing for a couple reasons:
1) I got the kid to dress in something Christmas-y, stand in front a X-mas tree and smile all at the same time. And
2) we moved into this house the weekend before Thanksgiving, the fact that I knew where the camera was, much less that I actually sent out X-mas cards is a X-mas miracle in itself.
And I managed to not have any moving boxes in the pix too! I'm amazing.
Wednesday, January 04, 2006
Tuesday, January 03, 2006
Actually, the big excitement for today is that I had my monthy check up. Baby (BS) is doing well, but I'm still not really gaining weight. I've gained 2 lbs now. It's super weird because I had gained like 15-20 by now w/TS. I had an amnio last month & BS measured to the date, so I'm not worried about it. I still had 15 lbs to lose from TS, so I'm actually pretty pleased about it. But today my Dr. told me I need to start eating. "I am eating." "No, I mean you need to start adding snacks or something." I had to laugh. It's random to be a chick in this generation and be told you need to gain weight. To eat snacks! I know in a month or two I'll look back at this & cringe cause I'll take her up on it and eat those snacks, and instead of going to the baby it'll go right to my fat arce.