Monday, April 21, 2008

The Real Moms of Silicon Valley

No, I’ve never watched that show. I really only know about it from the internet but it sure does get a lot of buzz.

My stomach is all in knots.
There a bit of a spat going on between BigSpeak & one of her friends, K. K’s mommy said something to me this weekend about the girls; blah, blah, blah…basically my daughter is bossy (yeah, you think?) and her daughter is kind of a doormat. Ummm, OK. So that was on Friday or something. On Sunday, in the car, BigSpeak is telling us some story and pipes up that K is her BFF and she does/plays everything she (BigSpeak) wants her to. Since she brought it up, I mention to her that K is a really good friend, especially since she pretty much lets BigSpeak pick what they’re playing all the time. But that BigSpeak needs to remember that part of being a good friend involves taking turns at who picks what you play and asking first if your friend wants to play that game; and if they don’t than doing something you both want to do. BigSpeak can be pretty sensitive, so she took what I said & turned it into criticism and wouldn’t talk to me or make eye contact for like an hour. Great.

K’s mommy role played w/her about what to say to BigSpeak. Today at school K told BigSpeak she didn’t want to play whatever was suggested and BigSpeak screwed up her face and told her that she didn’t like her anymore and didn’t want to be her friend. There was also supposedly some hitting and arm thrashing by my daughter. I say supposedly because BigSpeak is NOT a physical kid. She’s VERY passive aggressive, and the more I think I about it the more I’m surprised that she would do that. LittleSpeak, no problem, she’ll backhand you for looking at her the wrong way, but BigSpeak that’s just not her mode d’operandi. She’s more the trip you later kind of girl. I’m not saying my kid didn’t or wouldn’t do it, I’m just saying I find it hard to believe she did it if this story is all there is to it.

I got all this from K’s mommy who called me at work to tell me. The fact that she called me at work is a big red flag.

Did my child actually hurt your child? No.
Is your child still upset over it? No.
Hmmm, perhaps we should stay out of it? (Was it really so important that you couldn't email me or call me at home over it?)

I called my mom to see how BigSpeak was & nothing had been said about any of it and she was happily playing with her little sister. K really has been her BFF, so G'ma had asked her specifically if she'd played w/K today and all she got was a Yes. Interesting.

I called back K’s mommy & told her I would be talking to BigSpeak about hitting and making sure she apologized to K about that, cause it's not acceptable on any level. Otherwise, I felt it was really up to the girls to work it out. She agreed, but continued to go on about it. And it was really apparent that she needed to be “right” over this.

If she really agreed, why did she get involved in the first place?
I’m mad at my self because I inadvertently allowed her to pull me into this. Bah.

I feel like I’m in a really bad reality series.