Monday, April 10, 2006

The Name Game

In light of Gwyneth’s new baby and her unique choice of names (again) I guess now’s an appropriate time to talk about this one.

Today I am officially 1 month from my due date.

Typing the number 1 for month is so much more fun then 30 for days. 30 still sounds like a long time, don’t you think? Agree with me, I’m 9 months pregnant & hormonal; it’s in your best interest.


The way my body’s been acting I won’t be surprised if we go early (which is scary, cause I haven’t packed a bag yet, among other things,) but because I keep saying that, I’m sure I’ll be 2 weeks late and induced at that time. But I digress…

The name thing; we don’t have one yet.

Yup, we’re a month away and we haven’t decided on a name yet. Is that weird? Last time. we more or less had names picked out before we knew the sex of the baby. In fact we had arguments over boy’s names, which seem a bit ridiculous when you think about it. Why bother to fight over a name if you know you’re going to find out the sex of the child, but aren’t far enough along to know that yet? Save your energy for the name you know you’ll need.

I have names, but it’s one of those things that I haven’t gotten DS to nail down yet. I know not to push too much on this with him because if I declare I care too much and push, he’ll push back (and not in a good way). It’s his nature. So we’ve talked about it a couple times, but that’s all.

I think DS doesn’t really care for the most part. I think he wants to see how much I care and if he can negotiate anything out of it. Or maybe he just doesn’t want to discuss it, I’m not sure. He has thrown out one name, but it’s more to honor a family member (she’s an “adopted” Aunt). While I adore her I’m not crazy about her name for my child. And I have issues about family names (she's not actual blood, but close). Both of our families have been big on the passing down the name thing, mostly for boys, but variations of those names have been given to women in the families too. There’s currently one name in my family that belongs like 6 people, all currently alive. (I have no idea if you started counting those that passed on already, it would be beyond ridiculous .) It can get a bit confusing to say the least. If that’s your (or your family’s) thing, good for you, but I’m really not into it. I believe that my kids should be able to develop their own issues related to their names and not have to hear that one of their namesakes ended up being a loony alcoholic later in life (implying that they'll go down the same path).

While I’m not giving out any of the names on my short list (there’s only 2) since one of them could be BS’s real name & I don’t post our real names on here, here’s my name criteria:

  • I need to LOVE the name I give my child. I mean it. I NEED to LOVE it.
    • At some point in her life my child will hate her name. That’s human nature I think. I grew up pretty much hating my name, now I’m lukewarm on it. When my daughters ask me why on earth I choose their name, I need to be able to honestly tell them that I choose it because I love it and I need to really mean it. (I get all teary just thinking about it.)
      I knew TS would have her name since at least the age of 18 & I had her at age 34. DS was not impressed when he asked me. “Why that name?” and I answered, “I don’t know, but I became aware of it sometime in college and I’ve loved it ever since. I knew from that time if I ever had a daughter she would have to have this name.” He responded, “How can I compete with that?” To which I said, “You can’t, so just go along.” He wasn’t amused and like I said we had a few arguments over names last go around.
  • It can’t be a family name. (See Above.)

  • I prefer it not be an “M” name
    • All our pets are M’s (Merit, Mowry, Mama-san & Monkey) and our last name is an M. I’m not completely opposed to all M names, but I think in our case, it’s a bit much.
  • I like old names.
    • For girls I seem to tend toward turn-of-the-century names. I also seem to have a tendency toward Irish, Welsh & Celtic names.

    I guess that’s it. I figure if I go into labor and we haven’t picked one I get precedent since I’ll be the one in labor, right?


Antique Mommy said...

We didn't name Sean until he was about a week old, which the hospital didn't like one bit. Everyday someone from their records dept. would come by and ask "Ya gotta name for that kid yet?" We had a short list of names, but Sean was like #10! Finally, it just seemed right. I like old fashioned names too, and Celtic as well (obviously). The right name for this baby will settle upon you and you will know it. Hopefully sooner than a week after you give birth.